Settling in Unsettling Times

Three times this week the subject of moving entered my conversations. It takes so many shapes. I think COVID has tossed us all into a moving zone without any of us asking for it.

When we moved to BC two years ago it was a clear decision to uproot ourselves from familiar people, places and rhythms of life. Whoosh. Well not quite whoosh. We were intentional in talking about what we were letting go and what we would need in our new location to help us feel at home. We worked hard to move well; sorting belongings, talking about our needs, saying goodbyes and making connections when we arrived. It was almost a year from decision to sleeping in our new home. Not quite whoosh!

From the time I arrived I felt at home, yet I knew I wasn’t settled. We had family to welcome us, met new people and found groups we were interested in joining. We found a grocery story, a coffee shop, dry cleaners, a church and a WW group for me. Everyday felt like a holiday with a sense of freedom and freshness in the air. This fall it all changed. I felt a shift deep in my psyche. I was no longer on holiday. I missed the holiday feel, but I realized I had arrived home. No longer a tourist, now a settler. I like being settled. From decision to settling – three years – hardly a whoosh.

COVID has whipped us all around, untethering our souls from many of our anchors, our special people, places and rhythm. I think there is a similarity to what happens to us when we move.  We need to be kind to ourselves and those around us. It’s very disruptive to move, disruptive on a deep soul level. I was extremely happy in our move and yet I could feel that deep inside me I hadn’t arrived. It’s as though a part of my soul was driving across the country when the rest of me had flown. It takes time to move, time to settle. COVID is time to be gracious to ourselves and those around us. We’ve been forced to move without time to plan and we haven’t chosen our new home. It’s been allotted to us. Many of us haven’t arrived in the new location. We aren’t settled yet.

I know what helped me during my move was my awareness of God’s presence within and with me. I’m not alone. Maybe because of the move, the untethering from the familiar, I’ve gone deeper in my spiritual exploration and experience. So much around me is different, but God is constant, unchanging but constantly changing, constantly inviting me into more. In my uncertainty I’ve turned toward the Spirit. In unhooking from the familiar I’ve sought attachment more deeply to Spirit and to my closest companion.

Where do you turn when you feel uncertain, unsure, unsettled? Maybe in these unsettling times there is an invitation to you to go deeper, to explore God in new ways. And do remember, it takes time to feel at home in a new way of living, a new place.  

Love and prayers from a mystic in motion who’s enjoying being settled

Anne

Mystic in Motion

Companion on the Way with Contemplative Fire

Contemplative Fire Canada, Founder

Society Member with Shalem Institute for Contemplative Living

Companion with The Rivendell Way

Polepole

My heart is pounding. My breath is short. I stumble over one more rock on the trail. Behind me I heard, ‘Polepole. Walk polepole’.

It was my first fall living in the mountains and I was climbing with a seasoned hiker. ‘Anne, only walk as fast as you can walk without loosing your breath. Walk slowly. Walk polepole’. He described this wonderful Swahili expression that teaches one to walk slowly, gently and calmly. He wanted me to learn that I was to climb the mountain at my speed. I was to walk uphill slowly and steadily. It’s not a race. There’s no competition, only self-care, acceptance, wisdom and completion.

In my early days in the village, sometimes it seemed like too much work to climb the mountain behind my home. It’s like having a Stairmaster from a gym in my backyard, only I don’t get to chose how steep it is! What he was teaching me was that I can’t adjust the steepness but I’m completely in charge of my speed.

Since those early days I’ve changed my walking pace. My heart still pounds, but I seldom lose my breath. I walk polepole (sounds like ‘pulley-pulley’). And I enjoy my walks. I have time to breath, to enjoy the trees, the creek, the birds and anything else that my senses linger on.

I know that pace of life has helped me find my way. As a Mystic in Motion, I’m susceptible to the chaos and fast pace of our world. I need help to walk slowly and calmly, not taking on more than I can manage without loosing my breath, my grounding. I think too this relates to the bigger world. We’ve just entered another season of restrictions due to COVID19. I think it’s time to remember ‘polepole’. That means it’s time to move slowly, gently and calmly through the days. Not get out of breath through an overload of news, worries or anxieties. Time to hold life lightly, move through it gently, savoring what we see, accepting that we can’t change the size of the mountain, but we can change how we walk it. Polepole. We can walk polepole.

Are you fighting the ‘size’ of anything in your life? Is there anyway you might adjust your pace to ‘polepole’?

Love and prayers

Anne

Mystic in Motion

Companion on the Way with Contemplative Fire

Contemplative Fire Canada, Founder

Society Member with Shalem Institute for Contemplative Living

Companion with The Rivendell Way