One day, on a BC ferry, I looked up and the brilliant sunlight blinded my eyes. Even though bright sun in the winter is a rare treat to be savoured in BC, I had to close my eyes and turn away. The light was too much for me.
Have you had moments when you suddenly know something; a truth lands deep inside you, an awareness, an insight, a moment of clarity, an ‘Ah-ah’ moment, an epiphany? I’m sure you have. Suddenly we see a truth about ourselves, or someone else, or about relationships, or for some people it’s a scientific breakthrough. Mine aren’t world changing discoveries but are usually about myself or life in general. They’re special gifts, always just what is needed.
That ferry moment was another special learning. Just as I turned away from the brilliant sunshine, I often turn away from a deep truth that I’ve been shown. I might stay open to it for an instant or for a few minutes. I might hold it in my heart and mull it over on and off, even for years. Usually what happens, even if it’s a long-term mulling, is that I close the eyes of heart and understanding for it’s simply too brilliant for my ego self to remain open. Ego likes murky light. When the spiritual light is bright, the ego must surrender its dominance. One key aspect of spiritual growth is letting the ego surrender its central role, and take a more practical, needs-based role. What if I can strengthen my spiritual muscles so I remain open to the Light of Truth when it is given to me? Not pull back, but stay present, even walk into the Light, holding and owning the Truth. For some reason the Divine One has chosen to pull back the murky curtains of illusion that cover us in this world and give a glimpse into the bigger picture, the divine reality. I’m being given a Truth, with a capital ‘T’, that will move me forward as a human being. What if I remain open to that Truth?
What if you remain open to one of the truths you’ve received over the years? Can you go back and name one? And then rest in it, opening yourself to his life and energy?
This awareness feels so good to me. I don’t want to turn from the Light. I want to walk into the Light. I want to live in the Light.
Love and prayers
Mystic in Motion
Companion on the Way with Contemplative Fire
Companion on the Rivendell Way
Society Member of Shalem Institute for Contemplative Living
2 thoughts on “Blinded By Light”
I’ve loved reading your posts recently Anne. This one resonates. I was staying with friends at the weekend and heard a lot of morning birdsong (they live on the edge of countryside and Spring feels on its way here). I suddenly remembered a learning on a solitary retreat years ago. I had been reading Genesis 1 and thinking about “speech acts”; the idea that God spoke creatures into being. This weekend at the start of lent I had just read the passage about Jesus’ temptations in the desert and his response to the first one “People do not live by bread alone but by every word that comes from the mouth of God” (Matt 4.4) On that retreat years ago I saw birds on the bird feeder and remembered Genesis 1; how God spoke “let birds fly above the earth” and there the birds were. So each bird became a word from God, and fed my soul. It was a moment of epiphany, which I relived this weekend, watching the birds and listening to their song. 🙏💕
Thanks Ali. What a special moment of knowing God’s voice through bird songs. May those moments seep deep into your soul, nourishing you in unexpected ways. Lots more bird songs to come. 🙂
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