“What do you want?” —– Sometimes Jesus’ simplicity and directness just astounds me. As I re-entered my world after The Hermitage, I joined him as his disciples were joining him. He looked at me and said, with warm and gentle eyes, “What do you want Anne?”
What a great question! How often do we ask it of ourselves or of others? And how are wants and needs all mixed up? I think if I respond from a core place, they are very close.
Coming out of solitude, my wants were clear and simple. I tell him I want to remember all the wonderful embracing parts of my time in retreat. I want to continue to live in all the richness and learning from that week. I want to remember it all. I don’t want to forget anything! I want the next season of my life to be full, flowing with all the love and the positive energy I experienced.
I needed this time off work. I was deeply tired with low energy for leading or teaching. At one point I got cranky with my team. Here again wants and needs are mixed.
Sometimes it’s knowing what I want within myself, but other times it’s knowing what I want from someone else. Sometimes, from another person I want clarity, or an apology, or acknowledgement, or forgiveness or respect or a hug.
A bit of me wants Jesus to wave a magic wand and keep me held in the retreat awareness, but I know it doesn’t work like that. I have to do my part in remembering, and that begins with articulating my wants to him with an acceptance and awareness of human forgetfulness.
What do you want? What do you want for yourself? What do you want from someone else?
I’m appreciating this time of quietness in my life to be in touch with my deeper wants. I hope you will take some time too for being aware of your wants, your deep needs.
Love and prayers on the journey
Anne
Mystic in Motion